Eat Your Words
by AznAnimeGrl2649
Summary: .:DMHG:. After a massive food fight, Malfoy and Granger are the ones who have to clean it up. Needless to say, they are both unhappy about their punishment.


**A/N:** This is my third Harry Potter fanfic. Enjoy!

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**Started:** January 11, 2007

**Draft Finished:** January 11, 2007

**Fiction:** One-shot

**Rated:** PG-13

**Disclaimer:** The character and names of Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling. The plot belongs to me.

**Book:** Harry Potter

**Pairings:** DMHG

**Genre:** Romance/Humor

**Summary:** "Civil?" Malfoy scoffed. "Granger, the day I will be 'civil' is the day Potter dress up in a pink tutu, flying around on his broomstick and announcing to the whole wizarding world that he is gay!" One thing leads to another when Malfoy and Hermione have to clean up the Great Hall after a huge food fight.

Eat Your Words

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"This is all your fault, Granger." The head girl ignored him while she wiped the pudding off the glass window. "You, Potter, and that Weasel! This is servants' work. Wait til my father hears about this. Dumbledore must be off his rocker. There is no way this mess can be cleaned up by today." The blond frowned in disgust as he notices that he was getting more food on him than before. "Where is a house elf when you need one?"

"They have other things to do, Malfoy. So stop your whining and hurry up. I would like to get to class, if you don't mind," Hermione scolded.

"Of course I mind, Granger. I mind that I have to waste my whole afternoon cleaning the Great Hall with YOU! We're wizards for God's sakes!" Malfoy yelled, throwing down the brush back into the bucket of water. "I would have this place cleaned up in a minute if it wasn't for Dumbledore. What kind of punishment is this?"

"You're the one who started it, so get over it." This time, Malfoy turned to her. Walking over to her, he carefully avoided the mess below his feet. "Besides this wouldn't have happened if you would be civil for once."

"Civil?" Malfoy scoffed. "Granger, the day I will be 'civil' is the day Potter dress up in a pink tutu, flying around on his broomstick and announcing to the whole wizarding world that he is gay!"

"Whatever," Hermione rolled her eyes. There was no use talking to him. Right now, what she was concerned about was how to get the whole place spotless. It had been an hour and only a quarter of the Great Hall was clean. The process would have been faster if Malfoy would just grow up.

"Though, I have to admit. This might have been the best food fight in the history of Hogwarts." The bookworm, having read _Hogwarts, A History_ countless times to the point in which she can recite the whole thing by heart held her tongue. "And you have your bloody friends Potter and Weasel to thank for that." That's it. After an hour of hearing his stupid rant, it was driving her insane. Throwing the sponge down, she turned around to give him a piece of her mind.

"Will you shut up already?! Merlin! You rant like you've broken up with your girlfriend and need to talk about it to death!"

"Why don't you make me, Granger?" Malfoy raised a brow. A smirk appeared on his lips as he observed the brunette. She was covered with multiple stains from head to toe. Of course, he too was in the same state, though a little less messy. Moving closer to her, he stood face to face with the Muggle-born witch.

"I have better things to do. Get back to scrub the floors. Obviously, they aren't going scrub themselves."

"I don't take orders from you." Malfoy crossed his arms. "Besides, they can scrub themselves if I had my wand." Turning around, he headed toward the doors.

"Where are you going?"

"If you're so smart, you tell me." Hermione picked up her feet as she ran to catch up with him.

"You're going to get us in trouble! You can't just leave!" He was a couple of feet ahead of her.

"Granger, what the hell do you think I'm doing now?" He stopped. "Stop following me!"

"NO--" But it was too late. The instant Hermione caught up to him, she had slipped on a pile of mash potatoes and Malfoy being in front of her had to face the consequences, literally. He fell backwards with Hermione on top of him. It took him a movement after for him to register what had happened. With his head taking a violent impact while being knocked the air out of his lungs by Granger landing on top of him, Malfoy snapped into reality when he heard a couple of giggles coming from behind him. Looking up, he found some Hufflepuff students staring at their current situation. Just great. On impulse, he grabbed the collar of her uniform and pulled her even closer to his face.

"This is all your fault, Granger."

"So, how do we explain this one?" She asked sheepishly. Hanging her head to hide her embarrassment, Hermione realized that being on top is not always the best position to be in. As for Malfoy, he rolled his eyes. Next time, he will not going to let his emotions to get the best of him. It was one thing for him to start a food fight because of Potter, but it was another when Potter is touching his girlfriend in a way that it makes his blood boil.

'This is all your fault, Granger,' he thought. 'If only you did not taste so good'.

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**A/N:** This story takes place in their seventh year, in which Malfoy and Hermione are secretly dating. But after seeing Harry getting 'way more than friendly' with Hermione, Draco threw some food at Harry, starting a great big food fight in the Great Hall. This is just a cute one-shot I wanted to write for some time now. So forgive me if it's short. If you have any comments, questions, suggestions, please review. Don't forget to check out my profile for other stories and updates! Join my new community if you love this story! Review with any thoughts you might have about my writing. Constructive criticism is welcomed as long as it's in an intelligent matter.

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Thank you for reading!


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